Dias couldn`t do it. Vaas couldn`t either. Murali could only hope... and Aravinda de Silva? Forget about it! Bandula Warnapura had to give up the Fernando in his name!

Yes, since independence, no body has been president, prime minister or cricket captain of Sri Lanka without a Buddhist sounding surname!

Think of the Senanayakes, Bandaranayakes, Rajapakses, Wickremasinghes, Wickremanayakes, Premadasas, Wijetungas, Wijetungas, Kumaranatunges.

Can you imagine a President Fernando? If you have an F as the first letter of your surname, your leadership ambitions are f`ed up!

NM Perera and Colvin R de Silva were two of the most brilliant politicians that South Asia has produced in the last century. But can a Perera or de Silva be President? You must be joking.

Can a Cader or Kandasamy be president? Are you out of your mind to even think about it!

But after death of course many will lament, like in the case of Kadirgamar: He would have made a great president ...

So our hero, Sarath Fonseka turned to Aani Enterprises for help. Our advice: Rebrand yourself as a Veera Sinhalaya. Adopt a Buddhist sounding name. Drop the F. Even the JVP knew this. We had Rohana Wijeweera, Upatissa Gamanayake, Wimal Weerawansa, Somawansa Amarasinghe...but half of these guys were actually Fernandos and Pereras.

So my friends: meet Sarathsinhala Ponsekera, the saviour of the race, future president and star witness at Hague trials!